Dear All,
I don’t know about you, but for me doubt is a familiar companion. This part arises in the form of excessive planning, second guessing, rehashing, ruminating, talking to myself, talking to others. It seems like a purely mental process with the intention of trying to be certain, to make sure I do things right, and on this level, I can appreciate its protective intention.
Yet it can be painful and exhausting. It keeps my attention and focus in the mind, in the past, in the future, on apparent others - out of the body, out of the present moment - self-abandonment.
So where does this doubt come from? If I slow down and feel into the body in a moment of doubt, I notice that there are uncomfortable body sensations that are associated with fear. Fear of uncertainty, not knowing what will happen, not knowing what to do in order to stay safe. This part believes that if I don’t know, I could get everything wrong, I could be cast out of the safety of herd, I could die. Of course this doubting part wants to avoid all that, and intimacy and connection with myself and others are the price to pay.
What could it feel like to pause when a sense of uncertainty arises? Slow down and turn towards this fearful energy instead of moving away into the mind? To tune in more deeply to the patterns of this part, sensing the subtle qualities, allowing space for whatever is arising to be here, right now? What could be discovered? And what if all that is discovered calls awareness even deeper into the very Source of these energies? What does this feel like? Is this separate in any way from what you are?
You are all welcome to join me to find out what is here when we turn towards and open to the experience of uncertainty.
We plan to gather on Saturday October 4th at 10am Mountain time. All are welcome.
9am Pacific time
5pm/17h London
6pm/18h Amsterdam
If you would like to join us, please contact me here: embodied meditation sign up
The gathering is free and donations are accepted here:
https://paypal.me/openheartwisdom?locale.x=en_US
or at Wise: International Money Transfer | Transfer Money Overseas using the email address: mgedert9@gmail.com.